Just living

Time surely is flying by. My dad told me the other day that when time starts flying by for you, it means you are old. lol. Some days I do feel that way; especially the days that I'm chasing Ethan around and trying to clean up after him. It can really tucker you out. Since becoming a mom, I realized the other day (yes, my oldest is 9 so it's taken me 9 years!) that nothing is ever the same nor is anything that you thought was yours is yours. For instance, I like to make myself oatmeal with raisins for breakfast. All part of my eat healthy, lose weight concept that just doesn't seem to be working for me right now. Anyways, I make the kids breakfast and most school mornings they like to eat waffles. Ethan will eat three waffles and once finished will peek over at me and see that I have a bowl. He demands that I share with him. At first I tell him no way, this is mine but he keeps bugging me so I eventually give in. He takes two bites for every one of mine. It's not my oatmeal...it's his. And as I sit here typing this blog, I look at my water bottle that I filled so I would know how much water I have had for the day and I think it looks to be a little cloudy in there. Upon closer examination, I realize it must be cloudy because of all the bread crumb floaties in it courtesy of who else...Ethan. Yumm! So much for it being "my" water bottle. A few weeks ago, Matt and I created a play area in the basement for the kids in effort to reclaim the living room. We painted the wall, threw up some huge wall stickers, carpeted and put in shelves so the kids would stop dragging toys in the living room and I could get a break from cleaning up after them. Wanna know who has spent more time in the basement?? Me. My kids own our house...not myself or my husband. We find ourselves "hiding" in the basement just to get a break from the craziness upstairs. Atleast the basement area has toys for us to play with. The kids really aren't as bad as I am making it seem. We love our children and want them to be the best that they can be with all that we can teach them. It's just some days, I would really like to eat my entire bowl of oatmeal without any help. It's been a long time since I've done anything really for myself. Mostly my days are dedicated to making sure the family has clean clothes, a clean house, healthy meals, rides to and from dance/gymnastics, dog fed, etc etc etc. All the wonderful things mommies do even though they would rather be doing something else. lol. So, rather than "just living" and letting the days fly by I decided that I needed to help myself get back focusing on not only my family but myself also. My first step is to figure out why the heck I can't lose weight even after Ethan claims my breakfast and water. And I figure that if I post my journey here, it'll hold me accountable since I will know that some of you, my friends, are following me and are curious to see where I will make it to. So today I called the doctor's office to make an appointment. When asked what the appointment was for, I really didn't know what to say and I just blurted out because I'm overweight. lol. I think I need to have some bloodwork done to make sure my body is okay and if it's not, well, then maybe I can get it fixed. I've been teetering back and forth with my weight since our first child was born and I'm really just tired. I'm tired of going to my closet and seeing all the wonderful clothes I used to wear knowing that I can only really fit into a couple of shirts and maybe a few pairs of jeans. I want to be back in my size 7/8 jeans and I want to just love me again. Hopefully taking this initial step to have a doctor's point of view will help. I've heard the B12 shots work wonders for energy and may even help boost metabolism. We'll see. I'll let you know. I guess I'm getting my New Year's resolution out of the way here too. Lose weight, be happy and reclaim my breakfast and space.